The Exchange

In the equality of ones eyes, you stare into the world she stares into.

You look and wonder the wonder she wonders.
White flags and burned ashes, 

bare trees in paths of leaves.
Daisies in digged holes only to be climbed out of.

You stare and wonder, walk barefooted into the dirt.
Only to see the sun that shines upon one's world

And for one day; if she stares back into mine

one can only wonder, 

how clouds will try and stop to make her shine. 

Idealisme

Onderbroken vrijheid met opgelegde gehoorzaamheid baat bij de oppermachtige, maar de zwakkere wordt opzij geschoven.
Ideeën en gedachten vervlogen met de wind en weggespoeld door vloedgolven van idealisme.
Ideaal - ego - isme
Is ieder niet ideaal in zijn eigenheid?
Waarom is perfectionisme een doel en geen gemiddelde?
Ik ben perfect. Ik ben perfect mezelf.
Geen standaard van één of andere vervlogen maatschappij, maar een persoonlijkheid gevuld met eigen normen, waarden, dromen en ideeën.
IJdelheid maakt een tunnel van onze visie. We kijken te veel boven en onder ons, in plaats van naast ons.
Wie we ook zijn, we zijn perfect onszelf.
Met onze eigen ideeën en talenten.
Wij, zullen eeuwig bestaan.

Naakte totaliteit

Bekijk mensen in hun naakte totaliteit met vormen en rondingen die zelfs golven willen vervolledigen.
Met luidruchtige pigmenten en zwijgzame littekens die verhalen op ons lichaam uitschreeuwen.
Met haren die reiken tot in de wolken en voeten die zich nestelen in die diepe wortels van de ondergrond.
Standvastige flexibiliteit reist door ruimte en tijd, vervolledigd het leven dat wordt opgeslagen in de onvolledige eenzaamheid na het afscheid van zijn naaste.

Silence

I’m running out of pages to write down the words forever haunting me
Bleeding on paper with dark blue drops
Losing a staring contest in the mirror
to be defined as shy
Silence, the only cry I can do as loud as I can
No matter where I am
Why doesn't anyone talk?
In words I can rephrase as my own
Why don’t you want me this desperately
You’d bury your teeth into my bone?
Where are you now, princes of the night
Dressed in party armour, empty bottle armed
Where are you now to walk as cross as you speak
Silence, the only blood dropped word I can offer
Without being forgotten.

Quiet moments inside.

He looked himself in the mirror as he walked by. It’s a strange habit he has for when he see’s a reflection of himself he likes to take a quick glimpse of it. Not because he’s shallow or narcissistic, but to see if there is any reason at all to be proud of himself.
And like so many times before, he tried again. But the mirror showed what it always showed,
sad blue grayish eyes staring back at him with a burning hope of change. He quickly took his eyes of the mirror and went back into the living room where his roommate was studying in a little corner of the chamber. He stared at his own books and realized he had so much work to do but just couldn't get himself started. ‘Is this all there is to me?’ He wondered when he sat down behind his laptop, wishing it would be a typewriter like they had back in the 1940’s so he could finally start to write this idea he had for quite some time now.
See, he always wanted to be a writer but never really got further than scrabbling little poems in a black notebook he carried around all the time. And when he finally found time to write he’d tell himself that he wasn't ready to tell his story, that it has to be perfect.
He didn't want to disappoint himself. All he wants is to look in the mirror with pride. To look in those blue grayish eyes and tell them that he finally made his own standards which are so impossibly high.
Looking to his empty screen he grabbed his phone that was resting next to his elbow and started to read previous messages he had.
Did he screw that up too? Or was there still hope in that area of his life?
While he scrubbed his eyes back open, refusing them to close for just a second, he typed in a text message that he would never have the courage to send.
After deleting those words of truth from his phone he stared for a quiet moment and whispered ‘coward’, obviously addressed to himself.
He turned off his phone, closed his laptop and dived into his books, hoping not to drown in those words that were forever holding him back. 

When

When is it safe to go to sleep next to her and wake up in that same way?
When is it safe to hold her hand or tease her without pushing her away?
When can I go visit her unexpectedly without running into another me?
Or am I another you?
Is it safe to dream about her laying next to me?
To assume that my lips will be the only ones that will kiss yours?

I get insane thinking about this over and over and over again
If she really really really loves me,
Or if she's just another pretender.
I get lost in my own head trying to lock the way into my heart
So that it won't be stolen again.
I get ruined trying to save myself
that I look past the true reason I need saving for.

When is it safe to assume that we will not be left alone?
That we don't have to worry about losing anymore?

A young man's dream

Gazing into the setting sky
Clouds alter as they go by
Thinking about the life I own
I race the sunset, sick of racing alone

No clue where I stand still I know exactly where I am
Forced to look back to take a step ahead
A blurred view of skies crying leaves me trapped inside
no better option than to go back in and hide

Forced to be home bound, my heart still travels the wind
Swimming the rivers, climbing the trees I shall be free
stretching my arms to take a deep breath
one day this dream shall be reality

But when shall I find the courage to explore
To go on my way looking for more
To finally fly like an eagle insane
Traveling the wind heading north
I shall  be unconfined in being
Climbing mountains into the sky
to see those clouds alter
as they slowly go by 

Cowards run

Do not dare to give me a call
write me a letter or say something at all.
Do not dare to look me in the eye
do not dare to come to my door and cry
Run away cause that's what you're good at
run away as far as you can
I don't need your state of recognition
cause honesty requires a man.
I'll make you see your missing link in life
Strong I'll grow and tall I'll stand
never will you have the upper hand
I'll be better than you ever were
so don't you even bother
cause one day I'll have it all figured out
my wife will be happy and my kids will have a father.

Quote

"With our soul looking into the abyss as we nearly fall, we gather the strength to pull ourselves up and rise above our own expectations. As the impossible becomes possible in time, we face ourselves in a whole new light. 
We believe and we trust that things will get better."

Quote

"The day that we lose sight of what we want to become, our hopes and dreams dressed in children's tales, is the day we start to fail to see the beauty in life."

Ghost of the hallways

Imagine this boy that walks the hallways like a ghost all alone. He has no friends, just his backpack wrapped around his  shoulders looking down to the floor when someone passes him cause he’s scared to look them in the eyes even though he knows that they wont  look back. Imagine him sitting at the lunch table eating his sandwiches, looking at his knees. It’s like he reserved the whole table, cause no one is sitting there. Everyone else is minding their own business talking to their friends about some cool stuff that happened or playing some kind of card game. This boy I talk about just stares down until he stands up and walks to the exit, and no one even looked, or no one even wondered why he’s there all alone. I don’t even know what his voice sounds like.
Maybe he doesn't like company? Or maybe he just had a bad day and that’s why he didn't like to be in company of others? Or maybe.. just maybe.. he’s scared.
You see, some people have this natural strength and bravery to walk up to others and talk to them. To smile when they pass by or to randomly talk to the ones around them, but some people don’t have this strength, this bravery. Because it is taken from them or they never were fortunate enough of having it at all. And then what? What if you lack that strength? Some may answer that he shouldn't be pathetic about it and just get off his ass. Others may answer that it’s all his fault. Cause that’s who we are, aren't we? We all believe that it’s a one man’s battle against life. That you have to make it on your own or otherwise crumble in your own footsteps. It’s easy fighting with swords, but have you ever tried fighting bare knuckle  This boy fights with bare knuckles against life every single day. He fights cause no one has ever handed him a sword, a shield, an armour  No one has ever provided him with hope and belief that he can beat life, because no one has ever bothered to see him. Who knows how brave he can be or how strong he really is? He might be the bravest kid around there? How are we expecting him to do all the things that we do, when he’s never given the chance, that little push in the back we all got? The belief of not just ourselves, but of others that provides us with the confidence, the hope you can read in the eyes of others, that you matter, and they wish for you to be there. To be seen in the hallways and to look back.
It is easy to expect things from others, but is it easy to do them yourself?
We all want to be seen, we all wish to be hoped for, to be believed in.
Why is it so hard to do that for others?
This world might even be a better place for all of us.

We, the sailor

Young feet have a taste of living
with home just by it's side.
Letting go, young Columbus sails ahead
with lights dancing across the dark blue sky
towards a world he so briefly met.
The tide who softly alters
in a world of constant change.
Fearlessly we shall find our way.
So call me a sailor on a ship at sea,
for where we have been and where we will go
can be altered every day.

Kingdom

A goodbye without introduction
overseas with lifeboats at guard
Giants awaken at rock bottom
Playing a particular story-part
twists and turns, tumble and fall
my kingdom will crumble
if I had a kingdom at all
with chapters misunderstood
misread or miswritten, on pages in my soul
quiet breaths differ from shaking hands
with shoulders hunched I attempt to stand tall.

None shall shift and none shall turn
Giants with blazing fire eyes
will make my kingdom burn          
restless they'll stand steadfast
ruthless they shall destroy
so would you rewrite my soul
and transcend with chapters of glory.
so would you rebuild my kingdom
To consume that miswritten story.

The symphony of one

We are bound to the hearts of others, the life we lead shall be entangled and never shall our heart beat in isolated lonesomeness, but echo into the corridors of friendship, love and hate. Endless drums will fill the void of our existence, beat after beat, crossing other paths making a symphony of it’s own kind. It is then, that the determination of our life takes place. Where our future and past meet each other’s present. Do we alter our course of life within a split second? Or can it not be possible to have a life changing experience at the passage of a single breath?

From the moment of birth until the minute we perish, life orbits around us in little defining moments our memories will have in safekeeping within our minds. It is then that we must be cautious with the actions we plan to take, for it may be defining, not only for the fate of your own, but for the fate of those who’s heart beat in your symphony. 

Never rush your notes, they will come with their own time, leaving the silence between the former and the prior creating a sweet absence and a taste for more.

Quote

"De onbesproken stilte heerst luider dan de oorverdovende mening."

Whistle

I threw a penny in a wishing well
with a wish to bring you near
looking down in the deep
wishing you where here

I was holding a clover in my hand
Can't remember if it were three or four
you've got no eyes in your back
So I ran off looking for more

I stole the shoes of a horse
hoping those footsteps made you return to me
but it got wild and angry
now because of those shoes I cannot see

I ran through thirteen forests
across meadows, mountains and seas
Even though storms used to pass
I cannot feel a single breeze
Still searching,
hoping to find the luck I used to own
Cause ever since I learned your name
I hate it to be alone.

That drinking song!

Play the fiddle, and whistle all day long.
Dance and jump to every drinking song!
Bottoms up, to every man's call!
Take a long walk home
without a single fall.
Tomorrow we must be away
Rise up early to see the break of day
Scramble together all your courage and heart
to the beginning of a new story
The beginning of a new part

An adventure lies ahead
Facing danger,
when our return is not certain yet
But when we do, we'll play the fiddle
And we'll whistle like before
Go out and drink
Knock on every door!
Until again we must away
Pack our things and walk
to a possible dismay.
Even though our road is long
packing a small hope of return
We'll continue to sing our drinking song.

A bitter man's heart

I used to have a purpose
I used to have a rhyme
back when I was running away
Guess I changed with time.
I used to have a garden
flooded with flowers and trees
now they're all rotten
No more birds and no more bees
I used to have a purpose
And some love that I could share
But now I'm so bittered
that I don't even care.